God spoke so big to me about some of my struggles. He really told me to shut up and sit down on Sunday. I love it when he does that. (even though it is hard to hear) I was crying out to be heard because of my own hurt. Really started the ball rolling with Pastor Adrianne message to not let people have that much power. I know we all have someone or something that wants to steal our joy and steal our time from us.
Pastor Adrianne said "Don't give your happy away and Don't live alone with all your boundaries." Wait, What? I am choosing to give my happy away and putting up walls the lock people out? I stopped and looked at myself and saw the walls growing around me. I see the times that I am not happy because I have allowed this person or that person to control how I act around them. AND they have no clue what they have done to me or more likely what I think they have done to me.
Then this morning I was looking at facebook and this quote showed up: "You can't expect God to be the source of your peace if the world is the source of your satisfaction." - Toby Mac Peace isn't found in the absence of trails or having our dreams fulfilled. I will be redirecting my focus, "Putting the Blinders On!", and setting my sights on what God has promised me. I will aim to let go of the things I thought were meant to satisfy me and follow Him.
Yes, I have grieved heavily from the losses I have had to endure, and some days I still grieve. Some are great losses like losing a child and others are simpler like losing a friend. Pastor Adrianne said "You have a destiny start looking forward." I reflect on my past and can see the He has brought beauty and joy in the brokenness in ways I couldn't have imagined.
John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
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